How WordPress encourages those who write literary questions
Above is the new format WordPress uses to encourage you after you publish on your blog. Just like your mother, it’s there to tell you that you are awesome but you need to set some goals, oh, and you forgot to add these tags, but I’m not surprised really, you’re just like your father.
The best part, of course, is the quotation under your new goal, put there to motivate you. See the one in the picture above: “Dreams are illustrations from the book your soul is writing about you.” This was said to the author, Scott B., who has 13,686 friends but only 13 words. But not all pithy little sayings from WordPress are like that. For instance, this is what WordPress said to me yesterday after I posted: “That’s not writing at all, that’s typing.”
The quote is from Truman Capote, who said it about Jack Kerouac’s book On the Road, which chronicled Kerouac’s road trips with other members of the Beat generation. Truman was not invited, so he stayed home and wrote bestsellers like Breakfast at Tiffany’s and In Cold Blood.
Famous typist, Jack Kerouac (Photo by Palumbo via Wikipedia)
You have to understand that Truman grew up without a first name (his parents borrowed the neighbor’s last name, Truman, and made him use that), so he may have been jealous about Kerouac having two first names: Jean-Louis. Since Kerouac was also a poet, he chose the nickname Jack, because it rhymes with his last name. Most people don’t know this, but I know all this literary stuff because I studied some literature in college.
Since Capote was only 5’3”, his ego couldn’t squeeze into his body, so it became his bodyguard and liked to get drunk and talk trash about other writers. Writers like Jack Kerouac, who had his own problems with fame and alcohol, but still managed to get his own Wikipedia page.
Now, am I making some kind of comparison and saying WordPress is short? Based on its font size, yes. Am I saying it has an overly large ego? No, just an overly large logo. I have no idea if it gets drunk, but I wonder sometimes when I read Freshly Hammered Pressed. It certainly talks trash about typists like me, who have their own problems that unfortunately have nothing to do with fame or alcohol.
Apparently, WordPress reads my blog and isn’t afraid to give me its opinion. I can hardly wait to see what it has to say to me when I publish this post.
year-struck 
I have been intrigued by the new post-post-publication format that Word Press uses. I recently got a gold star! But then it’s likely that hundreds of thousand of other bloggers got one on the same day so I think I will hold off on the self-congratulations.
All gold stars are worth celebrating. The new format has some nifty features, but I could use quotations that are more encouraging and less snarky.
Well?
So, did I even pay attention when I posted? No. And yes, somebody needs to slap me upside the head. The last thing I write on the post is ‘I can’t wait to see…’ and then I don’t even look. Nobody can sabotage my life like me.
I agree that it is odd. So is it’s writing check — the one that doesn’t understand anything the least bit slang-y.
On the other hand, it’s free!
Thanks for the fun post.
Glad you liked it. The spellcheck is beyond odd. When I typed Kapista, it suggested Quipster, then after I saved the changes, it underlined Quipster, and suggested hipster. Seriously!
NOW I know why it’s so irritating! It IS like my mother!
I’m waiting for the “Did you remember to floss” feature.
I guess I wasn’t invited to that party – I don’t have that feature when I post ( I’m also 5’3″ and clearly this is all about me and I like wine . . . ).
I love your blog. I see it in the inbox and think “Oh good.” I have a feeling there is something much bigger than WordPress in your future.
On a different note, the WordPress snow on your blog makes it really difficult to scroll. It’s probably my lowly netbook with the problem, but it only happenes when I visit blogs with snow (maybe my netbook hates snow as much as I do 🙂 ).
Hmm. I, too, am 5′ 3″ and like wine. Neither one of us has a first name.
Thank you for the compliments. (I can send the money via PayPal.)
I had no idea the snow was irritating. It’s one of the few things I can control in life, so I will shut it off. Thanks for letting me know.
I, too, have a love-hate relationship with WordPress. Sometimes we don’t see eye to eye but hey, it’s free!
Kate, you know that logic and common sense confuse me. : )
And yes, size matters.
We speak of fonts, yes?
Speaking of fonts…we were speaking of fonts, yes? When did the fonts on WP become so very small as in tiny? Some blogs I need a magnifying glass–if anyone has an extra can I have it?
I have the same question, Patricia. I would like larger fonts on my blog but there doesn’t seem to be an option.
hahahha Truman Capote was a ‘funny’ man, a little creepy at times.
He certainly had personality.
I’ll have to pay more attention to WP comments. Wow.
I’m going to try to remember to keep track of the quotations.
The various WordPress Affirmations amuse me immensely, but not so much so that I actually bother to read much of the commentary. I rarely check stats, clean out my spam filter, or do other deeds of techno-derring, knowing as little as I do beyond On/Off, but once in awhile the persistent cheeriness of our benevolent WP overlords does indeed brighten my day. I adore the automated grammar checker, though, which offers endlessly entertaining and frequently astounding alternatives for not just grammar and punctuation but also proper names and a wide array of what I mistakenly thought were actual and recognizable parts of the English language.
I admire you, Kathryn, in your ability to ignore the quotes, suggestions, and stats. I’m a tiny bit more obsessive and check things everyday. I am spending more time trying to learn how it all works and just discovered why I wasn’t receiving notice of blogs I follow and how to fix that. For their motivational quotations, I’m sure they draw from a large pool of quotations on writing, which is a good idea in most cases.
Oh, boy! You know how to fix the no-notice problem on Followed blogs??? Please teach me! 🙂
Thanks so much for the help! I think I’ve now gotten a sizable improvement made in my roster. Better than the *incoming new post* email issue, your hint led me to a massive cleanup of the spammy goodies inundating my email in the Comments section. YAY!
You can change your follow settings on the left column under dashboard marked “Blogs I Follow” and also if you click on the WordPress icon just above the dashboard icon and go to “Read Blogs.” Next to that “Blogs I Follow,” you’ll see “Edit List.” If you click that you can select when you receive email notifications from those blogs – never, instantly, daily, weekly. I had several that were set at “Never” and that’s why I wasn’t getting them in my email. Hope this helps. I can also send you screenshots if my explanation isn’t clear.