Accusations are flying right and left about the upcoming Senate race here in Wisconsin. Of course, most, if not all, of the alleged accusations about vowel play originated on my computer because I needed a catchy headline for this post.
But I didn’t make up the part about the vowels. Wisconsin’s fate hinges on vowels – those joiners of consonants, the chatty members of the alphabet who always make their voices heard. They are the ones who mingle at the word parties and call out, “Group hug!” Vowels pull in the recalcitrant consonants who would just stand there speechless otherwise.
So on November 6, Wisconsinites will play political Wheel of Fortune and pick a vowel – an “a” or an “o.” Our next Senator will be a Tammy or a Tommy, that is, a Tam or a Tom.
The Tam, Ms. Baldwin (whose last name may already predict the outcome), threw her hat into the ring one year ago. I like to envision her throwing a tam into the ring (one of those woolen bonnets with a pom-pom on top, worn by the Scots and called a Tam o’Shanter.) Sadly, for no one else but me, Ms. Baldwin was not born into the O’Shanter family. By winning the election, Ms. Baldwin hopes to put a feather in her tam. The feather, of course, would be one plucked from the Tom she is running against.
The Tom, Mr. Thompson, hopes to defeat Ms. Baldwin and change that “a” in her last name to his favorite vowel, the “o.” It’s easy to snicker at the fact that tom is short for turkey, but remember, Benjamin Franklin, famous for ousting other presidents off the one hundred dollar bill since 1928, wanted the turkey to be our national symbol instead of the eagle.
As you know if you read this blog (and if you do, you have my sympathy), I have chosen to keep my thoughts on the best choice to myself. I plan to choose a vowel on November 6, but that’s between me and Alex Trebek.
year-struck 
Like my students, I prefer an “A” to an “O,” which looks so much like a “0”…. But not being a resident of Wisconsin I should keep my vowels under control….
Most people in education here in Wisconsin also prefer an “A” to an “O.”
The font used for comments makes a zero look just like a lower-case letter o….I meant the former!
Is this a snub of Pat Sajak?
Did you notice all of the A’s in Sajak’s name? It would look as if I were making some kind of political statement if I chose to use his name!
Love it. Being immediately south of your border, Illinois has its own share of vowels, but sadly, no A’s or O’s. Your post has prompted me to think (always a dangerous state of affairs) that perhaps the Land of Lincoln should be launching an investigation. Personally I suspect the consonants (you know how they are). While I follow your counsel in not telling many people you make me laugh, here I am…laughing. STOP IT!
Dan (1-vowel)
The results of the investigation are in. Illinois does have an O. Film at 11.
Sadly, not one of the independents running for U.S. Senator from Wisconsin is named Timothy. Then we’d have a Tammy, a Tommy, and Timmy.
…now if we could just get them to Broadway, they could win…you guessed it…a Tony.
OK…I’m done now. Dan
Or make a TV show called Tammy, Timmy, & Tommy and have it win an Emmy.
I’m done, too. For now.
Loved this one. I’ll be voting early for my vowel . Always afraid something will happen on regular voting day to keep me away. Will not miss this one.
Voting is a great privilege. I hope we have a good turnout this fall.
A -h Shucks, E-eek, how I-irritating , O-uch – what an U-nbelievably difficult choice you have to make on November 6th.
Very clever!
Gosh, I didn’t know Alex Trebek dealt in vowels! I though he only did questions and answers!
Trebek (I’ll take an “e,” please) hosted Wheel of Fortune in 1980, once in August 1985, and on April Fool’s Day in 1997. (I don’t watch much daytime TV. :))
*singing* Would you like to buy an O? They’re perfectly round you know…”
In American politics, people often buy their vowels. 🙂
I suggest you choose based on the alphabet and which letter comes first. It is only right to do it in order.
Very clever post, YS!
I thought you would suggest that.
Glad you liked the post.
How did you know? But it make complete sense. Things are always organized alphabetically.
“Vote early and vote often.” Too bad I’m not registered to vote/vate in Wisconsin/Wiscansin.
Clever, Ruth, and your second spelling of the state is the way most of the natives say it.
This is ridiculously off-topic, but have you ever seen the somewhat recent SNL bits with Alex Trebek? I think you would love them.
Regarding your story, I am always amazed by the way you can loop out and loop back in, and then out and back in, and then make a fantastic, solid landing! You are so funny, YS!
I haven’t see the SNL bits but will look online. I watch almost zero TV because of time and the Internet, but my mom watched “her shows” religiously, so I did watch them with her sometimes. For some reason, I always liked Alex Trebek the best.
The Alex Trebek pieces are from the 2000s when Tina Fey was the head writer. The bits consist of faux Alex Trebek getting taunted by faux Sean Connery (with various random celebrities). It’s very silly. I don’t know if you will find it funny or dumb. (And either response is okay!)
I knew a family of ten that used to get together every evening for dinner and Jeopardy!— it’s a fun show. What a nice memory of your mother!
O, what a dilemma A?…As our Canadian friends might say..But I liked the Bold-win reference, though it took me a couple of reads to figure it out..It is early in the morning..
I’m glad you caught the “bold win.”
Yup, sharp as a bowling ball, that’s me.